Today, Cayenne caught a squirrel.
The ballsy squirrels that roam our neighborhood regularly scamper precariously across the top of our six foot fence while Cayenne runs along the base of the fence, staring down the squirrel as she runs. How she doesn't run into the bushes without looking where she's running, I'll never know. There are times that the squirrels taunt her, chattering in the tree branches that hang over the tops of our fence. I'm quite sure that the *click*click*click sound that the squirrels make is equivalent to "Na-na-na-na-boo-boo". When the chattering starts, Cayenne gets desperate and literally parkors up the fence. Her head will clear the top of the fence, but I think she is too bottom heavy to get any higher than that.
Since she is bloodhound mix, all of this chasing is accompanied by "Rowrowrowrow!" and "Boooooooooooowwwwwww" (Bow, as in bow and arrow) This is what a bloodhound bark looks like when written out. The more you know.
This morning started like most mornings. Cayenne was out back and an occasional "Rowrowrowrow" echoed throughout the neighborhood. I'm sure my neighbors love me. I'd call Cayenne inside every now and then to break up the monotony of her barks, but after a while a different sound was echoing in the neighborhood. A mix between a squeaking mouse and a kid playing dead. I walked outside onto the deck and what to my wondering eyes should appear? Cayenne, tossing a mortified squirrel five to six feet into the air. "Cayenne!" I yelled. Of course she paid me no mind. I mean little to nothing when there is a squirrel in her sites, and this time it was in her mouth. No way would she let me stop her play. I'm sure Cayenne was convinced she was simply playing with the helpless animal, and tossing it in the air was a mere gesture to get the squirrel to play back.
As I tried to save this helpless soul from the jaw of my dog, the following exchange happened:
AMBER: [Yelling] "Cayenne! Sit! Drop it! Leave it! Cayenne! No!"
(I imagine if Cayenne were to talk, she would speak like Mrs. Doubtfire, so try to read the following exchange in her voice for an accurate immersion into the situation.)
[Cayenne tosses the small animal into the air]
CAYENNE: "Mom. Seriously chill. We're just playing."
AMBER: [Calmer, but firm] "Cayenne, drop it!"
[Cayenne catches the rodent softly in her mouth]
CAYENNE: [A bit muffled] Squirrel is not an it! Squirrel is an animal and my best friend!
[Cayenne tosses the squirrel into the sky]
AMBER: [Apprehensively steps towards Cayenne, extremely calm] Cayenne... come here.
CAYENNE: [Suddenly stop in her play] Oh are you sad? What's up? What's wrong? How can I help? GAK!
[Amber grabs Cayenne's collar as squirrel lands on the ground]
CAYENNE: MY FRIIIIIIEEEEND!!!!
My guy took the limp squirrel to the side of the house in the front yard, in hopes that it would emerge from its petrified state and find safety elsewhere... Unfortunately, I think it may have chattered its last chatter. Poor little guy. I let Cayenne back out back and she immediately ran over to the closed fence gate, peaking through the fence slats, craning to get a glimpse of her petrified friend. "Rowrow! Rowrowrowrow!"
CAYENNE: [Sniffing frantically] Squirrel! Are we still gonna play?! I had so much planned for us today! That was only the beginning! Squirrel! This isn't fair! This is a lame game! I can't even get over there to play!
"Rowrowrowrow!"
After about thirty minutes of Cayenne switching between barking at the unresponsive squirrel and sniffing frantically, she accepted that her friend had left her.
If only squirrels could read. I would post a warning sign on my fence:
DO NOT ENTER, YOU MAY NOT ESCAPE.
-Amber
No comments:
Post a Comment